Man, this has not been an easy week for anyone. For some reason, BG3 has been extra fussy this week. You wouldn’t know it based on all the pictures I post, but it’s real. I don’t know if it’s her touch of colic reaching its peak, or if the Zantac isn’t working as well anymore (because she’s a little bigger and the dosing is now off) and her acid reflux is bothering her, or what. She’s just been very cranky, even if we hold her. She still has some calm moments, but the majority of the day she’s pretty cranky. We’ll be seeing her Peds in a couple weeks so hopefully we’ll get the Zantac dose changed and maybe that will help a bit.
It could also be because she’s not sleeping as well as she used to. It’s not hard getting her to fall asleep, but she has trouble staying asleep. Even at night, when she used to sleep for 3-4 hours at a time, now she’s only sleeping for around 2 hours at a time. We get her back to sleep easily enough, but I think she’s not getting enough restful sleep, you know? I don’t know if its the fussiness that’s causing it or vice versa, because she’ll stir and start kicking and squirming, and she’s been very dependent on her pacifier lately.
The Alimentum seems to be working for now. Her poop is still on the wet side, but I haven’t seen any signs of mucus. Her BMs have also decreased from 6-7 times a day to 3-4 times a day. Looks like we’ll be on this for awhile and see how it goes. Fingers crossed!
I’m trying to come to terms with the fact that she’s one of those babies that will just never eat a lot. She’s staying steady with her 5 bottles/20oz a day, with good days (where she’ll take an extra bottle) and bad days (where she’ll take one less). I used to want to rip my hair out at this and fret over every ounce, but I’m doing my best to just let it go and keep in mind that she’s not really going to let herself starve. Whether she’s getting enough nutrients and absorbing it properly, who knows, but it’s kind of out of my hands. Here’s hoping she continues to gain weight.
I have been feeling very terrible lately because since she’s been extra cranky, I’ve been extra cranky. My heart breaks when she cries, but then I also get so mad/frustrated. I try to repeat the mantra that “it’s not her fault”, “she’s just a baby”, “it’s okay if she cries a little” and all that jazz, but I know I definitely haven’t been handling it very well. You would think this was my first baby with all the emotions and craziness I’ve been going through. There have been times where I just want to scream or cry along with her, and I do take part every now and then, but I direct more towards the wall than anything else. And then I feel even worse and the guilt creeps in. Especially when after her crying fits and all that fussiness, she totally melts me with her smiles and those eyes. Sigh…